True Life: Working with Seth Godin, Crying at Work, and "PTFA"

True Life: Working with Seth Godin, Crying at Work, and “PTFA”

There are critical, life-altering moments in every person’s life. I define critical and life-altering as the times that challenge my core beliefs and ways of thinking. These are the experiences that push me the most, often times frustrate me the most, but also, in reflecting back, teach me an enormous amount about who I am and what matters.

One such experience like this was The Domino Project. It was a year ago yesterday that I embarked on an unknown journey with Seth Godin and seven others to challenge the publishing industry. We published twelve books, all bestsellers, and learned a lot about what’s possible in publishing and at work. Seth did a great recap of project results here and here so I’m not going to talk about the publishing takeaways.

In fact, an understanding of the publishing industry is not what I took away from the experience. I actually didn’t learn very much about it. Sure, I had the opportunity to, but what really interested me was learning about team dynamics, fighting resistance, mastering emotions, managing conflict, and planning ahead. I was far more interested in internal and team developments than the impact on the publishing industry.

Here are some of my biggest lessons and mistakes, of things I did well and not so well, and some amazing things I learned from the people I worked with…

> You need resistance to grow. Whether you’re building muscles or your frame of mind, without resistance, it’s hard to experience growth. There were times when I felt physically and emotionally exhausted from the project. Whether I was resisting to doing work that I didn’t feel particularly thrilled about doing or letting the voice of “can you really do this?” creep in, this all-consuming struggle overtook me at times. I got angry. I broke down and cried twice. I even fainted in the office one day. The more exhausted I got, the more in touch I got with my subconscious to challenge my assumptions about what’s possible. This sparked breakthroughs and moments of surprise. It also sparked a semi-unhealthy wine habit for a few months. Luckily, I’ve kicked that habit since.

> Suck it up and do the work. As with any start-up environment, there will often be instances when you’re presented with work that you don’t feel particularly excited about doing. For better or for worse, I’m really terrible at doing things that I don’t enjoy or that don’t feel aligned with my purpose. It paralyzes me. In experiencing this, I’ve realized there are two options: suck it up and do the work or find someone else who enjoys doing it. I’m a huge advocate of people focusing as much as possible on their natural talents so I tend to make the latter happen. I’ve found that this approach has a significant impact on happiness and fulfillment too.

> Listen to your body. As much as “doing the work” and “fighting the resistance” is important, so is listening to your body. There’s a fine line between working your ass off and working on the right things for the right reasons. In moments of frustration and pain, I realized a disconnect between the work I was doing and the work I’m most passionate about. This caused me to do more of what I’m passionate about, both within the project and on the side. It was only through the pain, and writing incessantly to find answers, that I discovered the work I’m meant to be doing.

> Fuel your own ambitions. Understanding the vision of the people I was working with was just as important as having my own vision. For me, the experience wasn’t about challenging publishing. It was about clarifying my purpose, challenging myself, and using the experience as a vehicle for learning, understanding, and launching my own ambitions into the world. I realized that “living your passion” isn’t something that happens over night. It often takes experience, experimentation, and mastery to even discover passion. That’s why, in parallel to working at Domino, I launched my storytelling concept revolution.is and a “Passion Experiment” program aimed at helping people unleash their full potential. No matter where we are or what we’re working on, we can use our immediate experiences as fuel for our own ambitions.

> PTFA aka Plan the fuck ahead. I was not the planner on the team. I much preferred improvisation and letting things organically evolve. This only went so far. Michael, our planning superstar, who I had a love and hate relationship with during the project, sat on the opposite spectrum. In the end, I learned that thinking ahead and planning, even if it doesn’t go according to plan, far outweighs going with the flow. Some of the painful lessons that I learned from working with Michael probably have had the most impact on me today.

> Even the smartest, most inspirational, and most revered people are just that… people. People ask me all the time, “What was it like working with Seth?” I’m never really sure what people are expecting me to tell them. And to be honest, I never really know how to answer this question. “He cooked us lunch every day … He types harder on his keyboard than anyone I know … He’s wicked smart … He’s an incredible man.” The truth is, even the smartest, most inspirational, and most revered people are just that… people.

All in all, this was a profound learning experience. Special thanks to Seth, my incredible teammates, Derek Sivers for his mentorship, James Wu for pushing me to apply, Jason Kende for helping me find my voice, and Nate Bagley for being my right-hand behind-the-scenes guy.

No matter where you are in life, take action on the most pressing opportunity in your immediate vicinity. Even if it’s not “perfect,” it will teach you far more than what you envision as being “perfect.” In fact, it will likely help you realize and fuel what actually matters.

(ps - I stole the team photo from here.)